Watching the Scenery or Watching the Tube?

Let's face it, you would love to say that you traveled the country from Maine to San Diego, from Seattle to Miami, and you spent the entire trip having meaningful experiences with your children, playing amazingly creative games, having thoughtful conversations, and admiring the beautiful landscapes as you whiz by at 70 miles per hour.  But - let's face it - that's not happening.  At some point, screens are going on.  Here's our tips on how to deal with that.

1) Screen time - Let me be clear that I am decidedly not a fan of screen time.  However, I also can't avoid the fact that it is going to happen on roadtrips.  From the beginning, we have maintained one consistent rule about screens - no screens before lunch.  Why?  In the morning, the kids are still fresh, they have yet to develop road-fatigue, and thus creative games and conversations are still possible.  Once you have been driving for 3 to 4 hours, it is perfectly reasonable for the kids to get a bit cranky and, let's face it, they will do a lot less complaining if they can sit slack-jawed staring at a movie.

In our first years, we had an actual TV with a VCR built in that we would place between the front seats (note: VHS tapes take up a lot of room).  When we bought a new van we had a DVD player installed, and once that broke we purchased one of those two-screen DVD players that can either hang behind the seats or be held by the kids.  We always bring a mix of movies - some Disney and Pixar favorites that the kids can watch forever (I know "Ratatouille" by heart, although I have never actually watched it), but also some of our favorites that we hope our kids will enjoy.  If you like old musicals, as we do, you get the bonus of having a nice soundtrack playing behind you.

2) Big kid screen time - Of course, as our kids have grown and technology has progressed, smartphones have entered our world.  It is much harder to tell a 16-year old to hold off on Instagram for four hours, especially when they are locked in a car for that entire time.  Our main approach has been to try to incorporate their screens into the trip.  While we request that they try to be present and involved with the family, those phones can also be used as additional cameras to catch interesting things as we whiz by them, as sources for trivia games, and as jukeboxes for name that tune or other such games.  As with anything that involves kids and their phones, whether or not they use them in a healthy way is a function of an ongoing conversation between parent and child.  The time in the car should be a continuing of that discussion.